1 year Sept 12th. Hard to believe how fast time passes us by. Does missing someone get any easier, no!! But somehow, by only the grace of God, you learn to live again for all there is to live for!!!
When I heard this song, it made me think of the last few weeks of my husbands life. Loosing the battle to cancer, but gaining eternity, forever healed, with Jesus. I didn't want to think I was going to loose him. To me, nothing is over until God says it's over. Sometimes the ones going through the suffering know a lot more than those of us who are pleading with God. I know Michael knew something I didn't know just by our conversations. The crazy thing was, he was at peace. I would pray like I've never prayed before, and all Mike would say is, "Thy will" be done God. That's when I believe God started to prepare me. I came into agreement with Mikes request to our Lord.
About 1 year after my husband surrendered his life to Jesus, he was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer. I think I was in more shock than he was, and I was definitely mad at God. Yet knowing God understood my confusion, I cried out, "what the heck is going on God?" All I could ask God was ..... "Why, why now? He just gave his life to You. Our marriage is suppose to be all that You ever wanted it to be. Oh God, please let me have more years with him to serve You together." I know God heard me. But in the quietest voice I think I ever heard God speak in my life, He was saying..."This is where I always wanted your husband, that I gave you, to be with Me. In a love relationship with me." Wow, talk about humbling someone. That went straight to my heart. I started to understand all the hard times of our marriage, and why God held it together. It was, "for such a time as this."(Esther 4:14) Mike battled with a lot, as we all do, but nothing that the blood of Jesus doesn't cover. It covers a multitude of sin! (1 Peter 4: 8)
Mike and I prayed, along with many others, in believing that if it was God's will he would beat this. Mike fought a good fight with faith and love for God all the way through. Never once did he get mad at God. I even asked him that question many times, and he said, "of course not." The way Michael handled his suffering, I couldn't help but be completely humbled. I learned so much from Michael in the time when God was calling him home.
The lyrics of this song were more of something within myself. Michael was never confused about anything. He knew God saw him, heard him, and had better plans for him than this world could ever offer him. Mike accepted it. Now he has goodness with him forever and ever. I miss him everyday, but God's will was done. I will see him again, because we share the same faith in Jesus. Victory in His Name!!
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Kim
These words seem so simple, "Thy Will be Done", but if we truly mean them when we say/sing them, they have the power to completely transform our lives!
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